Reflections on Motherhood and Life as a Doula

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Back to Basics

Family

Before I buy a homeschool curriculum for Stephen, I want to make sure that this decision is still something we both desire and that we are actually capable of succeeding.

I decided that before anything else, I needed to clean house.  We need to surround ourselves with toys and activities that promote imagination play, a growing attention span, and fine motor skills.  I went through all of the bedrooms with a trashbag and a donation box.  I kept the building blocks, tracks, Lincoln Logs, costumes/dress-up clothes, instruments, and their kitchen.  All of the plastic, talking, light-up toys were tossed immediately (sorry to any family and friends who've spent your hard earned money on these gifts for my children).

The house is cleaner, there is A LOT more interactive playtime, and everyone seems genuinely happier. 

As if we don't read enough books as it is, I have designated some extra time slots in the day for reading.  It is one of Stephen's favorite things to do and Delaney is starting to join in the fun, now that she has given up her title of "Queen Close the Books" (thank God).  It is so awesome to have him read stories to me now, because of his developing memorization skills and ability to follow pictures.  It is also so cool to see Delaney get excited about certain books we read.

Stephen and I have been taking advantage of Delaney's nap and working on a lot of crafts and activities.  Our favorites: labeling baggies with letters and going on scavenger hunts to find objects that begin with each letter and put them in the bags, cutting paper (who woulda thunk that would be so fun), and baking in the kitchen.

I'm feeling more and more confident with our homeschooling decision.

Marriage

Mike and I have yet again simplified our lives even more.  As we slowly live more and more off the land, I become more of the wife I have dreamed of being.  My cooking skills have improved and I'm beginning to enjoy the process.  This has also helped to improve our relationship.  It is nice for Mike to come home to dinner already made after a long day at work, and I feel better about myself.

As Mike builds a larger, sturdier coop, I look forward to increasing our flock and beginning the meat bird process.  I'm also looking forward to our master bedroom being completed.  I tell myself it will give us more privacy, but the truth is that I enjoy my kids curled up between us.

Birth

My summer break from "doula-ing" was much needed, but it took a lot to not say yes to all of the requests.  I've had some major revelations on my break from births.
1.  Our current medical system is truly robbing women and babies from something they need and deserve.
2.  Who am I to tell a woman whether or not she was empwoered or satisfied with her birth?

I am simply an ear to listen and can offer information/education if they are seeking it.  But, I will continue to fight for the right of women AND babies to experience a natural, empowering, spiritual, peaceful and gentle birth.  If the information I put out there offends a few, I am sorry.  The information and stories NEED to get out there to at least plant the seed in ALL people. 

My heart breaks for the moms and babies who are undergoing cesarean sections, inductions and all interventions that are not medically necessary.  "Big babies", going past 40 weeks, and being uncomfortable are not medical reasons to intervene.  Careproviders should be held responsible for their lack of TRUE informed consent, and moms HAVE to educate themselves - not just for their own experience, but for their innocent babies who don't have the ability to speak up for themselves. 

I have decided to start working toward my CBE certification and offer classes to help with the education process.  I am so excited about this next step, but am deeply saddened by the number of pregnant women who seem to have no desire to learn more.  I pray that they get the birth they are looking for and that in future pregnancies they open their minds to further educating themselves on all the different options and aspects of childbirth.

I am so thankful for all of my new clients (and past)!  It is an inspiration to see more and more women taking their births back!

Trust your body.  Trust your baby.  Trust birth.